From a reader (wife) who wants to stay anonymous:

It’s strange to write things like this down, but it’s something that I have been thinking about.

I’ve only kissed or tasted one man since I started dating my future husband, some 20 years ago. I haven’t been caressed or kissed by anyone since then. Even before I met my husband, I didn’t really have a lot of experience. I was naïve, and all I knew was that I was supposed to meet the right guy and marry him. Which I did, and I have never regretted that once in my life! I’d do it all over again.

I’m also not ashamed that I’ve been so faithful and loyal to my husband, since that’s all we knew about for most of our life. If I’d have cheated, it would have been a massive betrayal, and I would have regretted it. So I’m proud of how faithful I have been, and I love that I’ve never once given my husband a reason to doubt my loyalty.

But if I’m being honest, way down deep I have gotten curious about what another man would be like. Mainly things like kissing, hugging, holding close, but also much more explicit things too. I’m surprised at myself! But I feel free to imagine things a lot more lately.

My husband and I have been talking about some of his fantasies. I’ll admit, I was shocked at him at first, because I thought he’d be the last man to ever think about something like this. After I told him I didn’t like talking about this kind of thing (honestly, I was very uncomfortable), the truth is that it got in my head. It’s kind of like a song that’s too catchy, and so you have to whistle it or hum it all day. I just hadn’t known that there were other ideas out there.

I’m not at a point where I’m ready to start meeting guys to date, even though my husband says he’d be okay with that. I still have things to think about. But I definitely know I’m looking at men a whole lot differently these days.

What I found more surprising is that I’m looking at myself differently too. I haven’t lost anything, and I’m still the same loving wife and mom. What has happened is that I’ve got a whole different sense of how attractive I might be, or something like that. Hard to explain it exactly. My husband says he’s noticed “something different”, and we are having more (and I think better) sex than we have in years. Thanks, other guys! Lol.

This is all pretty new to me, and I’m still thinking it over. But I know that I definitely have some curiousity about what I might like to do. It’s not a threat to my husband, and it’s making a good thing even better.

I think I’m going to to try something I never tried, which is flirting. I never learned how, even when I was younger. I’m also paying more attention to what I find attractive in men. I’m honestly…just more horny lately. One day I came pretty close to downloading Tinder to see what it was like, but I chickened out. I think I want my husband to be there if I do that, and I’m still too chicken to bring it up. It’s hard enough to admit it anonymously, but it’s also liberating and sort of sexy.

I’m still the same loyal wifey, but I’m having some fun with my husband’s crazy idea. I’m also glad to see that we’re not alone. Is it just me, or does everyone else who’s 40 years old start doing things like this? I guess I just notice it more now that I’m looking into it.

Big questions I have about actually doing something like this are mostly about safety. I think I want to make sure I would only see a guy who has been tested. I’d want to be someplace safe and secret. I think I’d like to do it out of town, and have a real date. I like the idea of dinner and the whole works. These are some of the things I have questions about. But even the questions are sexy, which is something my husband pointed out.

Awesome—good luck, guys!!!