We’re sharing an excellent overview article by Brenna at Front Porch Swingers. Here, she details how friendships, professional relationships, and sexual satisfaction (of course) have been positively impacted by opening up her marriage.
Her big takeaways from her own experiences fall under three big headers;
Lifestyle Ladies Tend to Treat Other Females Differently—Women in free and open lifestyle relationships are very often kinder, more complimentary and supportive of other women.
Lifestyle LadiesTell Others What They Want—Women who play around with others gain confidence in the bedroom, which leads to confidence in the workplace and everywhere else!
Lifestyle LadiesCan Speak Honestly with Others About Sex—Women who are free to openly share ideas with their female friends have a leg up on gaining satisfaction and confidence.
Between the main headers you’ll find some great thoughts and experiences that might make you smile. And it’s a short read—it’s worth your time!
Self Magazine recently published an overview of factors that weigh into whether a couple might benefit from an open relationship (and three factors that would make it a bad idea).
It’s a very level-headed discussion. Hopefully it’s a good indication of how society is opening up to common sense in a very important area. So many problems can be avoided if we’re honest with ourselves about who we are as individuals!
Since the transition from Tumblr, the blog has been rather inactive. In the meantime, plenty of great new resources and discussion outlets have sprung up.
One of these is a one-year old subreddit, r/cuckoldpsychology. It already has over 13,000 members. Awesome!
Unlike most hotwife/cuckold sites, the discussion stays on the kinds of things people will want to know about as they explore changing their established relationship. In other words, it’s not a lot of captions and erotica. Below is a little sample of a recent post.
Pretty new hotwifing podcast: Holly’s Hotwife Life.
This is an introductory episode, which touches lightly on:
What they’re like as a couple
What she’s like as a person
How the fantasy came up in conversation
False starts
The first experience (it gets pretty sexy right at this point!)
How things have been going since then
Highly recommended for people who are more curious about their own fantasies!
Check it out, and support her great endeavor to provide public information on this kink! Rate the podcast, and drop her a line with questions and comments. Note: we’re not affiliated with this podcast at all—we just think it’s great that she’s doing this public service! 😁
Have you seen this caption on people’s Facebook or Tumblr pages?
You know, usually on the page of your friend or relative who married a cheating douchebag, who then abandoned her when he was confronted? Yes, we can all agree that sucks. Nobody in their right mind would advocate for Mr. Cheato Jerkwad.
Yeah, this fills a need for them. It helps them imagine the love and security they never got from their partner. I’ll never ridicule them or argue on their timeline about it. They’ve already been through plenty.
What they’re trying to express with this caption is a deep-seated need we all have. They’re asking, “Will you be loyal to me? Or do I have to be afraid of losing you, too?”
We’re explicitly, totally against cheating. And we feel sorry for anyone who’s been betrayed.
Unfortunately, this caption also creates extremely unrealistic expectations. (Exactly as dumb and unrealistic as a lot of the ridiculous hotwifing captions you thumb through on here.)
If this is the measure of true love, you might as well hire an animator to paint you into a Disney movie, because this is a fantasy that doesn’t take into account biology, psychology, or the kind of development that occurs in the healthiest relationships.
Besides that, the whole thing is so vague. Who is “a psychology professor?” Is it a man or a woman? Are they American, Czech, Thai, or Hatian? Do they work at a big college, a community college, or a basement correspondence school? Did they say this in class, or while giving a toast at a wedding, or after watching a romantic comedy with friends?
It sounds more like somebody said something they really felt should be true, then looked for a way to give it some authority. “Oh, you know who people think are smart about these things? Psychology professors!” So they invented the fact that a psychology professor said this thing that they want to be true. It makes it feel more true.
But the statement itself is so absolute and one-sided. All people are absolutely monogamous demisexuals? Widows who still love their deceasing husband will never be able to get attracted to a living guy? Swingers who stay married for 60 years weren’t in love? You mean polyamorous people don’t exist? That’s pretty extreme.
Let’s get it straight: this isn’t a psychology fact at all. It’s…
a nice sentiment, like unicorns and Care Bears
a way for betrayed people to imagine what a better person would be like
guaranteed clickbait
widely believed, especially in conservative contexts (some churches teach things like this)
detrimental to people in real relationships
an extremist position
not something you’ll find agreeable to many real-world therapists and psychology professors
great for cartoons and Hallmark movies, but not for real life
So in conclusion, this meme applies in a way to cheaters and those they abandon. It’s completely irrelevant for most of us. And exploring our fantasies together in a loving, full-communication, functional marriage can go a long way to preventing people from even being tempted to cheat.
So ladies, keep checking out men’s butts, and be sure to tell your husband about it 😈. Guys, don’t start to develop needless anxiety because you read something like this caption.You’re both fine. Don’t let shit like this mess with your head. It doesn’t apply to us!
A Wife’s Guide for Bringing up Hotwifing
Emma writes that most people who raise the prospect of hotwifing are husbands. That’s probably true for now, for two reasons:
Wives are only just beginning to hear about it, so the exposure hasn ’t been there for wives to consider it for very long, and
Wives with the fantasy are more reluctant to bring it up for fear of triggering their husband’s jealousy, sounding slutty, or worse.
Regardless of why, the truth is that I hear about more and more wives who have this interest. They’re good wives who love their husbands, and they can’t imagine how to raise their fantasies with their husbands without hurting their feelings or angering them.
That’s where Emma’s article is so valuable. She explains why this topic can be so sensitive for husbands who haven’t previously considered it, and explains some ways for making sure he’s ready to listen. This is kind of a big bombshell to drop on men who have only ever heard of (a) monogamy or (b) cheating. He’s going to assume the worst if he can’t take a deep breath and hear about all the different options in between these two familiar words.
The basic needs he has are the same as yours: respect, confidence, boundaries, and a general sense of stability and security. If his needs for love and security are met, he’ll be more interested in listening.
You can also send him to sites like this one and others. Learning about compersion can be really important, and seeing just how aroused other husbands get by their wives “naughty behavior” can help them see different ways of looking at their wife’s sexuality. Ideally, he won’t just consent—hopefully he can get to where it turns him on like crazy. Like in all our dirty captions! 😈
As time goes on and more women get in touch with this fantasy, we’re going to need a lot more articles like this one!
WATCHING MULTIPLE MEN HAVE SEX WITH THE SAME WOMAN STRENGTHENS SPERM.
Consider this: In a study in which researchers collected straight men’s ejaculate after they masturbated to one of two different pornos, they found that guys who viewed a gangbang scenario in which multiple men were having sex with the same woman released more active sperm than guys who watched a video of lesbian group sex. In other words, it seems that men are unknowingly increasing the sperm level in their ejaculate in response to the specter of competition.
Actually, it’s nice when you can find a playmate who can actually provide a mini-vacation!
Dinner, drinks, some sort of fun distractions…Even if you never actually had sex.
This is one of the big reasons why many married women seek out affairs after 10–20 years of marriage. It’s a shame they have to lie and deceive to get something that’s basically pretty understandable. And tame.
And as many specialists are concluding: besides the unethical deception, the long-term benefits can be really good. If you remove the terrible parts (lying, betrayal) and do it ethically, it can be extremely beneficial for a weary wife and mother.
(Even better if the husband finds it arousing to imagine what she’s doing.)
It’s just a short getaway, and you can return home to the family feeling very relaxed and ready to reconnect.
Hotwife Facts and Fantasies 