Hotwifing vs. Open Relationships

Here are a few selections from the article:

To be perfectly honest, I don’t have the energy or patience to love one more human being in my life, if I don’t have to…

The overall idea is not letting monogamy limit you from being fulfilled by other relationships and what they can offer you…

If she’s got spare time to connect with a man, it’s going to be with her husband, hands down…

As for me, I am very monogamous in that respect. I feel happy and fulfilled by one partner. If we ever decided to be completely monogamous, I don’t think I’d mind. For now though, I love being a shared wife and intend to take full advantage of it.

Read the whole thing! Click below.

Hotwifing vs. Open Relationships – A Shared Wife, Hotwife Blog, Erotic Stories

stagnationhw:

A strong relationship is crucial to success in any variety of the lifestyle. Put yourselves first above all else.

Why Married Couples Are Into Cuckolding (excerpts)

(Note: this article is more about hotwifing than cuckolding as it’s usually defined in the lifestyle sense)

“…many of these couples had quite extraordinary levels of commitment, showed deep mutual respect, and communicated skillfully. A significant number also reported very high levels of marital satisfaction and sexual satisfaction after decades of being together, a rather unusual state of affairs.”

“This fascinating subset of swinging and kink is the second most commonly searched term by heterosexual porn users on English-language search engines, and researcher Justin Lehmiller found in a survey of 4,000 men that 58% of them had fantasies about sharing their partner with other men…”

“What strikes Ley most, he told me, is the incredible resourcefulness and creativity of the arrangements he witnessed. ‘It’s like these guys understand the very real sexual power of the women they’re partnered with,’ he marveled.”

Read the whole article at the link below.

Why Married Couples Are Into Cuckolding

Jealousy vs. Compersion by O.M Grey

raphaelariemer-blog:

Everyone already knows what jealousy is, some of us more intimately than others, but compersion is “a state of empathetic happiness and joy experienced when an individual’s current or former romantic partner experiences happiness and joy through an outside source, including, but not limited to, another romantic interest.” (taken from Wikipedia)

Other than the “that doesn’t work” knee-jerk reaction to polyamory or open relationships, the other excuse that gets automatically thrown out is “I could never do that. I’m far too jealous.”

Discussion over.

Jealousy is most definitely a strong deterrent to even entertaining thoughts of an open relationship. Believe me, if you had told me 10 years ago that I would be in a polyamorous marriage with my husband, I would’ve told you that you were certifiably insane. After all, I’m a triple Scorpio: highly possessive and intensely jealous by nature. Throw in some serious self-esteem issues and an crippling fear of abandonment and I was the last person anyone (including me) thought would end up in an open relationship. But here I am! Happily polyamorous and talking about it publicly, no less.

Do I still get jealous? You better fucking believe it.

Is it as crippling as it used to be? Not usually.

The root of jealousy is fear. Fear of abandonment. Fear that your loved one will find someone better, smarter, sexier, more awesome, more whatever. The problem with those fears is that they are all inside the jealous person. No amount of reassurance from your beloved on its own will quell those fears. You must take responsibility for your own fears and express them to your SO without making them solely responsible for those fears. Your partner in life, spouse or otherwise significant other, does have a responsibility for your heart as you do theirs, but ultimately that responsibility lies within yourself. They can support and reassure and earn your trust, but they can’t quell those fears on their own. It’s a team effort.

The death of jealousy begins in honesty and trust.

Once that trust is in place. Once you are able to say anything to your partner and they to you. Once you talk openly, honestly, and frequently, that jealousy begins to die. The love deepens past that you could’ve ever imagined, loving your partner so completely if for no other reason that they love you so completely for who you are.

It’s not an easy place to get to. It’s not luck. It’s not luxury. It’s months and years of work, sometimes tears, and intense vulnerability. It’s believing in yourself and in your partner. It’s believing in you as a couple. It’s knowing without a shadow of a doubt that the two of you will get through anything because you are a team. You’ve done the work. You’ve established a firm foundation of trust and honesty, and nothing will break that apart, certainly not sex with someone new. Sex is wonderful, but sex is sometimes just sex. Although sometimes it is sex and love, which can feel a bit more threatening, but it’s really not because once you get to that point with your primary partner, you also deeply realize that love is not finite.

Love breeds love.

Desire breeds desire.

And you will find yourself loving your partner even more, even when you thought that wouldn’t be possible, because they love you for who you really are, not who they think you are…not who they want you to be, but for YOU. And you love them the exact same way. From this place of deep love and trust, a sexual encounter or even a satellite relationship takes on a whole new meaning. It is more love for your beloved! It is allowing them to feel desired and be pleased by another person…because they deserve as much love and desire and fulfillment that they can handle.

Because you love them that deeply.

And that’s compersion.

You are happy that they are happy. You are thrilled that they had a new experience, felt the rush of desire in a first kiss all over again, enjoyed being touched only the way a new lover can touch…etc. Then they can come home and tell you about it, or not, and love you even more for allowing them both freedom and security. And you get the same from them. It’s really rather beautiful.

Compersion trumps jealousy every time because love always trumps fear, if you can find the courage to let it.

slutdoublelife:

yessiraustralia-again:

One of the drawbacks of being my girl

Hahaha this is me like all the time 😂

You definitely need secrets if you want a strong marriage full of naughty fun. Enjoy your secrets! It’s part of the fun!

“Us against the world”

Hotwife Myths

Here’s a good post from a great blogger, Emma, who writes some great reflections on common misconceptions that men and women who are curious might have on the topic of hotwifing.

Myth 1: All Hotwives are nymphomaniacs

I guess the rationale behind this one is that if a woman needs more than her husband’s penis then she must be highly sexed. I’ll agree that a lot of fellow Hotwives do have a higher than average sex drive but that’s not always the reason they choose the lifestyle. I think only a small percentage of women became a Hotwife because their husband couldn’t cope with the demand. As I put it in my last blog post, Hotwives may be insatiable, but not necessarily just for sex. We have a hunger for the variety other men bring into our sex life.

Myth 2: The Hotwife’s husband must be a dud

Hotwives generally don’t get into the lifestyle because their husbands are awful in bed. If anything, it’s a man who is confident in his bedroom skills that can invite another man or two to share his precious wife. He knows the pleasure is in different lovers, not better lovers. He also knows that he only has one penis and there is immense delight in having more than one cock to appreciate at the same time. A Hotwife’s husband is therefore pretty darn awesome in bed if you ask me. He understands her needs.

Myth 3: A Woman needs Hotwife ‘Training’

What?? You’re either a Hotwife or you’re not right? I think the idea that a woman can be converted into a Hotwife is somewhat demeaning. I’m a shared wife out of my own volition. I don’t need to be coaxed into having sex with other men. I guess if the ‘training’ is meant to be an extrapolation of the dominant/submissive relationship, then by all means go for it. I personally don’t view what I do as putting myself in an inferior or subservient position to my husband, nor a superior one. We both equally enjoy me being a Hotwife.

Myth 4: A Hotwife must be in a bad marriage

Far from it. If a woman is in an unhappy marriage and agrees to sleep with other men, then I think it’s a last ditch effort to put some spark back into the union, or it’s already at death’s door. At any rate, it won’t last. Introducing other people into a couple’s sex life requires honesty, trust and the ability to communicate. If they don’t exist in a marriage then the couple has no business doing anything other than improving their primary relationship. It’s only when you have a solid base that swinging or Hotwifing can be enjoyed for the uncomplicated fun they are.

Myth 5: There must be something ‘wrong’ with a Hotwife

Maybe it sounds too good to be true for some men? Why would a happily married woman seek sex outside of the marriage? Is she a freak? Is she bored? Is she walking the road to self-destruction? The best thing to do is assume nothing about a Hotwife who invites you to fuck her. Take the offer at face value. There are no strings attached and if you decide to stop seeing her, then you don’t need to grow eyes on the back of your head for fear that she will axe you. Trust me, she’s moved on to the next able body. Hotwives are completely regular women who do regular things. In bed, she just wants a little extra on the side. No need to think beyond that.